No one tells you how much cancer is going to mess with your mind—not just the obvious fear and anxiety, but the way it slowly, brutally, and relentlessly alters how you see yourself. The surgeries, the treatments, the scars, the weight changes, the hair loss—each one chips away at the person you thought you were. It’s like staring into a funhouse mirror that’s anything but fun, where you’re searching for a glimpse of the old you but keep coming up short.

Let’s be real: It’s not easy to look in the mirror and love what you see when everything familiar feels like it’s been ripped away. Society sells us this image of “fighting cancer gracefully,” but there’s nothing graceful about feeling like a stranger in your own skin. You might not recognize the body that’s staring back at you. You might even resent it. And that’s okay.

This isn’t about finding a silver lining or slapping on a brave face—it’s about raw honesty. It’s about admitting that it hurts, that you’re angry, that some days you want to scream at the universe for putting you through this. It’s about giving yourself permission to feel whatever it is you’re feeling without the pressure to “bounce back” or “stay positive.” Some days, it’s enough just to get through the next five minutes.

This image is a self-portrait I created during my own treatment—a moment captured when I was grappling with all of this. It’s not polished, it’s not pretty, but it’s real. It’s a snapshot of a woman trying to make peace with a body she barely recognized. There’s no one-size-fits-all path to accepting the changes that cancer leaves behind. Sometimes, grace looks like surviving the day. Sometimes, it’s letting yourself grieve what you’ve lost without apology.



So if you’re struggling with what you see in the mirror, know you’re not alone. Be patient with yourself. There’s no right way to do this. Give yourself the time you need, however long that takes, and remember—you are more than the sum of your scars. 💙🦋